Fashion Tumblr Themes

21, college student, works at Old Navy, loves unicorns








1/1

RAVENCLAW
{ wear }

POTTERMORE
{ wear }

level55:

sleepysketchu:

movingconstantly:

justastupidhoe:

sageofmagic:

… Her long hair, still wet from the shower, had been combed down her back in a wet swath. Hilda was sitting on the floor, her round, wet boobs still wet from the shower’s water. She dried off the water with a towel, which then became wet.Hilda gasped when she saw a reflection in her bedroom mirror: through the slightly open door, she caught a glimpse of the chiseled abs and square jaw of the mysterious stranger who shared her cabin. She stood and spun around, her breasts swinging heavily with the momentum. She grabbed the door and flung it open, revealing shirtless Torolf (which was seriously his name) quivering with desire in the hallway.Torolf was ashamed at being caught, but his shame made him even hotter – hotter for sex. He stepped into the room, and his bulging abs accidentally smushed into Hilda’s rich chest.As Hilda’s buttermilk bosoms squished up against his granite abs, Torolf almost had a dick aneurysm.“Hilda,” Torolf murmured thickly, his throbbing meat wand pressing against Hilda’s warm thighs. “There is a secret I need to not tell you: You are my forbidden desire.”Hilda had been waiting to hear these words. Her heart was lifted on golden wings and soared toward a radiant sun of perfect joy. She saw herself and Torolf happy together, bathed in the golden light of love. Her snooch got all warm, too.“Torolf,” Hilda moaned, her lush teats straining with desire. “I need you.”Torolf, coarse abs pulsing softly in the moonlight, stood silently.Hilda looked at him expectantly.“Oh, sorry,” she added. “Torolf, I need you – sexually.”At hearing those beautiful words, Torolf flexed his rough-hewn abs and Hilda found herself being guided to her soft bed by the sheer force of Torolf’s undulating midsection. She parted her thighs in anticipation, exposing the soft pink petals of her clunge.Torolf entered her like she was a lottery. His engorged pecker pushed inside her and she felt fulfilled with sexual fulfillment.Hilda clutched at the bedsheets with lust and ecstasy and her hands. Her spongy love mountains hurled to and fro with each pounding. Her body was like a beautiful flower that was opening and somebody was pushing their dick inside it.Then Torolf moaned, arched his back, and suffered from dick Parkinson’s. He pumped in all of his hot pearlescent sperms as Hilda spasmed with so many orgasms!The two lay still for a moment as the stinky scent of lovemaking billowed around the room.Hilda got out of bed, still shimmering with orgasm. She glowed with contentment, like a cat who ate the cream of the crop.She walked across the room and picked up her towel, still wet with shower water. “Torolf,” she said softly, “there’s something I have to tell you…”But her bed was empty.Torolf was gone, escaped out the bedroom window. In the distance, Hilda heard the fading sound of galloping abs.

this is so terrible

I want so bad to make a dramatic reading of this

I lost it at throbbing meat wand omg

what.

level55:

sleepysketchu:

movingconstantly:

justastupidhoe:

sageofmagic:

… Her long hair, still wet from the shower, had been combed down her back in a wet swath. Hilda was sitting on the floor, her round, wet boobs still wet from the shower’s water. She dried off the water with a towel, which then became wet.
Hilda gasped when she saw a reflection in her bedroom mirror: through the slightly open door, she caught a glimpse of the chiseled abs and square jaw of the mysterious stranger who shared her cabin. She stood and spun around, her breasts swinging heavily with the momentum. She grabbed the door and flung it open, revealing shirtless Torolf (which was seriously his name) quivering with desire in the hallway.
Torolf was ashamed at being caught, but his shame made him even hotter – hotter for sex. He stepped into the room, and his bulging abs accidentally smushed into Hilda’s rich chest.
As Hilda’s buttermilk bosoms squished up against his granite abs, Torolf almost had a dick aneurysm.
“Hilda,” Torolf murmured thickly, his throbbing meat wand pressing against Hilda’s warm thighs. “There is a secret I need to not tell you: You are my forbidden desire.”
Hilda had been waiting to hear these words. Her heart was lifted on golden wings and soared toward a radiant sun of perfect joy. She saw herself and Torolf happy together, bathed in the golden light of love. Her snooch got all warm, too.
“Torolf,” Hilda moaned, her lush teats straining with desire. “I need you.”
Torolf, coarse abs pulsing softly in the moonlight, stood silently.
Hilda looked at him expectantly.
“Oh, sorry,” she added. “Torolf, I need you – sexually.”
At hearing those beautiful words, Torolf flexed his rough-hewn abs and Hilda found herself being guided to her soft bed by the sheer force of Torolf’s undulating midsection. She parted her thighs in anticipation, exposing the soft pink petals of her clunge.
Torolf entered her like she was a lottery. His engorged pecker pushed inside her and she felt fulfilled with sexual fulfillment.
Hilda clutched at the bedsheets with lust and ecstasy and her hands. Her spongy love mountains hurled to and fro with each pounding. Her body was like a beautiful flower that was opening and somebody was pushing their dick inside it.
Then Torolf moaned, arched his back, and suffered from dick Parkinson’s. He pumped in all of his hot pearlescent sperms as Hilda spasmed with so many orgasms!
The two lay still for a moment as the stinky scent of lovemaking billowed around the room.
Hilda got out of bed, still shimmering with orgasm. She glowed with contentment, like a cat who ate the cream of the crop.
She walked across the room and picked up her towel, still wet with shower water. “Torolf,” she said softly, “there’s something I have to tell you…”
But her bed was empty.
Torolf was gone, escaped out the bedroom window. In the distance, Hilda heard the fading sound of galloping abs.

this is so terrible

I want so bad to make a dramatic reading of this

I lost it at throbbing meat wand omg

what.

(via dirkydirkandthefunkybunch)


  1. misspaula74 reblogged this from stilettov and added:
    Wow.Fifty Shades is almost a brilliant literary classic in comparison to…this.
  2. stilettov reblogged this from the-fool-in-me and added:
    I hope to god this is a real book.
  3. the-fool-in-me reblogged this from sageofmagic and added:
    dick Parkinson’s dick Parkinson’s DICK PARKINSON’S
  4. oppasandchocolate reblogged this from wtfasianfanfics and added:
    “…The sound of galloping abs.” Was this book a joke?!
  5. a-yoruntoyou reblogged this from jonghyun-is-never-off-key
  6. jonghyun-is-never-off-key reblogged this from oppaforbreakfastlunchanddinner and added:
    Holy shit this is so awful! I thought Fifty Shades of Grey was bad… DAMN! Are you sure this isn’t a hoax? Dick...
  7. oppaforbreakfastlunchanddinner reblogged this from wtfasianfanfics
  8. blingthekey reblogged this from wtfasianfanfics
  9. sehonethemormon reblogged this from wtfasianfanfics
  10. thenastro reblogged this from timetotimewarp
  11. haveyouseentheskyline reblogged this from timetotimewarp
  12. a-rising-phoenix reblogged this from timetotimewarp
  13. timetotimewarp reblogged this from sageofmagic
  14. sith-lord-zedi reblogged this from insatiable-affection
  15. insatiable-affection reblogged this from wtfasianfanfics
  16. yongguk-aka-shishimato reblogged this from wtfasianfanfics
  17. calluna reblogged this from sageofmagic and added:
    #dickattack
  18. xeyeslikestars reblogged this from wtfasianfanfics
  19. andialwayslisten reblogged this from sassawho
  20. chibular reblogged this from epicepeolator
  21. epicepeolator reblogged this from therealhephap
  22. whatwesaytothegodofdeath reblogged this from therealhephap
  23. therealhephap reblogged this from self-sailing-ships